SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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