After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
