broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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