Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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