i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
