I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
