he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I didn't notice because vodka
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Randomize
