kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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