My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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