She is in my trunk
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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