The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize