I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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