Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
