addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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