I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize