the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
