i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
