i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Randomize