Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
