Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
