now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
