He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I just had sex on a roof
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
