Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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