idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
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