but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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