dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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