How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
