So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
