careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
