then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
