Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
