I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
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