you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Randomize
