was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Randomize
