I just pynch a tree in the face
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Randomize
