bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
