You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
two words: eviction party
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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