Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
