Dual....:-)
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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