There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
