Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
