Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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