glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
