I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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