Kiss
Puke
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
