Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize