I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
