scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
