My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
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