We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
