I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
